Some few weeks before my birthday last year, I was visited by a familiar feeling: the life-is-slipping-through-my-fingers feeling that I started having since I turned 25. Around the same time, what with all the personal crises I was going through, I fell into some sort of self-diagnosed depression. Feeling sorry for myself for the things I still have not seen, experienced and accomplished that some people my age have, I began second-guessing all the decisions I made in the past that lead me to where I was last year, and, worse, blaming all the people around me that I claimed to have restrained me from seeing, experiencing and accomplishing those things and, ultimately, “living a full life.”
I felt like I was on a losing streak and I was on my knees praying for it to stop. Not many people are aware of the personal hell that I went through last year, especially the people that I used to live with. The entire ordeal made me realize my weaknesses, which is very humbling. I knew what I needed to do, but with opportunities scarce in that city in California at the time, I did not know where to start. I was desperately seeking for a break that did not seem to come.
Thankfully, I managed to have built amazing relationships with amazing people over the years. That, I see as a major accomplishment. A long chat with my good friend, Vera, well, did not exactly turn my life around (just yet), but it sure did pick me up. Keeping the law of attraction in mind, she told me to start focusing on the things I want to accomplish in the near future. To do that, she said, I needed to create a vision board.
I realized that I did not exactly know what I really wanted. Sure, there were the obvious dreams made of a peaceful and drama-free personal life, a great career, being able to travel around the world and so on. Or, maybe I did, I just did not know how to achieve them. Vera told me not worry about the “how” and just focus on the “what”. All I have to do is get the “what” out there and the universe, as Paulo Coelho wrote in his best-selling novel, The Alchemist, will conspire to make it happen. So, I started looking for pictures that I can cut out and paste into my vision board. It was fun and it since felt like I am halfway to accomplishing everything I had on my board. I do not know why, though, but I left this vision board in California when I moved to New Jersey.
And that is why I am doing this.